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  • Sarah Lagler-Clark

To see and be seen

It’s a new year, and for many of us a new year means resolutions. I tend to have mixed feelings about resolutions. I think the whole idea of a new year, new me is undoubtedly corny. Just because we turn the calendar year or decade, does not mean that we all of a sudden become new people and leave all of our old habits in the past. However, I do think that a new year can be a good time for self reflection and to, in some regard, hit the reset button.


My overarching resolution for 2020 is to invest in myself and in others. Now, this is a very broad resolution, so stay with me while I narrow it down a little. To begin, I intend to invest in myself. I am a firm believer that we cannot pour from an empty cup. In order for me to be able to have an impact on others in the way that I want to, I need to fill my cup first.

 

We cannot pour from an empty cup

 

This holiday season was kind of hectic for me personally. I often feel grounded in my routines, and taking a break can sometimes feel unsettling to me. It was this unrest that got me thinking about what types of habits and routines I wanted to bring into the new year. I realized that maybe my new year would not consist of a new me, but instead a better me. I began to really self reflect and decide who I wanted to be in this new decade. In order to become the person that I want to be, I believe that I first need to invest in myself. I decided I wanted to be more active, so I set a few fitness goals. I decided I wanted to feel better overall, so I set some health oriented goals. I love the outdoors and I realized I haven’t been spending enough time outside, so I set a goal to get outside more and simply enjoy nature. These goals are not drastic, they are in fact quite small, but they are going to contribute to a better me, and that’s what I’m going for.


Next, I intend to invest in others. One of the biggest things that I want out of this year is to see and be seen. I want people to know me, to understand me, and to really see me for who I am. On the flip side, I want to know others in this way as well. This here is no small task. This level of knowing takes transparency and vulnerability, two things that are not easy to come by, but which are the cornerstones of deep human connection. They say that nothing worth having comes easily, so this year I’m deciding to be vulnerable, to be open and to be seen. There is so much strength and beauty in transparency. It is here, and only here where we can strengthen our human connection. And seriously, what’s more important than that? I’m truly excited to embark on this journey of getting to know the people around me on a deeper level. Although it is going to be a challenge, it will be a good one. I know that it will take deliberate time and effort. It will take asking the questions, and really listening to the answers. It will take care and concern and maybe even rejection, but if there is nothing ventured then there is nothing gained.

 

There is so much strength and beauty in transparency

 
This is Hannah. I am so lucky to be seen by her on such a deep level. I am ever thankful for her.

I challenge everyone reading this to give this a try. No matter who you have in your life right now, take a few extra minutes a day to get them know them better. Ask the hard questions, share a little more of yourself. We live in a lonely world, and the only way to make it less lonely is to invest in each other. We have so many preconceived notions about each other. “She’s too this” and “he’s too that”. Instead of standing by these notions, why don’t we give that stranger a chance, a chance to prove us wrong.

 

The only way to make it less lonely is to invest in each other

 

My intention for this year is to expand. I know that the only way I’ll be able to do this is with no judgement and an open mind. I want to be the person who sees others. Not surface level, but for who they really are. I want to be the person who has the humility to learn from others. Above all else, I want this year to be filled with transparency and vulnerability because these things will light the way towards love and growth.

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